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Love Expensive Bad!

Feb 15, 2025
Dem Boys Seh, Features / Columnists


Kaieteur News- Valentine’s Day come and gone, and all dem man wah spent big still rubbing dem pocket like if magic gon bring back de money. Dem boys seh, dis day is not about love—nah, love free, is de fantasy wah does cost yuh life savings!

Dem flower man and chocolate seller does turn into financial terrorists overnight. A lil bouquet wah does normally cost $10,000 suddenly turn $20,000, and if yuh complain, dem does look at yuh like yuh got commitment issues. Chocolates wah stale from Christmas dust off and sell as “premium Belgian cocoa” fuh five times de price. But is not even de flowers and chocolate wah wuk yuh wallet—it’s dem dinner reservations!

Dem restaurant people does smell desperation from a mile away. Dem boys seh, dem got a special Valentine menu, but de only ting special is de price! One lil chicken breast, two string beans, and a mashed potato dem call “culinary experience” and charge yuh like yuh eating gold. Yuh does book a table at 7 PM, but by 7:05, dem waiter already watching yuh plate like yuh overstaying yuh welcome.

And de hotel industry? Oh skites! Is like dem know Guyanese got a weakness fuh Valentine romance. Suddenly, every lil room in de city transform into a “luxury lovers’ suite,” complete with one towel folded into a swan and a bottle of cheap wine dem calling “complimentary.” And de real kicker? Some man does book de room two months in advance and still end up sleeping in dem car when dem side piece and dem main squeeze show up at de same time!

Dem boys seh, Valentine’s Day is de biggest economic scam since dem oil contract. Yuh spending money fuh prove yuh love, but by de next morning, yuh back to real life—same arguments, same stress, and now, an overdraft. If yuh want fuh really celebrate love, stay home, cook lil cook up and curry, and keep yuh money in yuh pocket.

But nobody gon listen. Next year, same thing gon happen—de only ting fatter than dem roses gon be dem price tag!

Talk half. Leff half.

( Love Expensive Bad!)


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